I gifted this mug to my father when I was a child. Every time I watched him drink his morning coffee from it, it warmed my heart. I spent years seeking his attention. His validation. His love. I know now that I wasted so much time seeking.
My dad gave me exactly what I needed from him. My strength. My tenacity. My determination. My survival skills. My athleticism. And most importantly the knowledge that the love and support I was seeking as a child was there all along. It was always right here with me. If only, back then I could have seen that. Could have given myself the love and support I thought I needed and wanted from him.
April 11th marked the 25th anniversary of the day my father collapsed in my arms from a massive heart attack. That day is forever etched in my mind. Although it took another 12 years for him to officially pass away, he left the world as we know it that day. No more smokes, no more Michelob Lights, no more hunting, no more fishing, no more ball throwing, no more house projects, no more hugs.
I love you dad and miss you every day.